Skip to main content

fear. faith. faithful.

tuesday was supposed to be a peaceful day. the girls and i were meeting up with friends for a small picnic.
we were enjoying a light lunch with watermelon and sammies and pita and hummus.
we were laughing, playing, admiring our children and appreciating the summer.

suddenly viy is on the ground. in my arms. not responding entirely. her eyes roll back. i feel her limp. shallow breathing. she is so small and helpless, crumpled here in my embrace.

i do not cry. i cannot cry. my friends are there to help in any way. i somehow talk through a 911 call. i talk to my hubby. i am approached by officers; i try to explain that my baby is going in and out of consciousness... for what seems like forever followed by an eternity. i tell cai that her sissy is fine. i tell viy that everything is fine; Jesus is with her. i see the ambulance.
my hero... so strong

i am fearful, but i hold tight to my faith. i pray to a faithful God.

i do not know how i did not break down and sob, but i know that my prayers were heard. my heart was heavy, but the beats were hollow echoing against cai's high-pitched screams. i waited for viyah to cry.

i waited for God to look, to move, to comfort.

in the ambulance, caiah prayed for her sister too. and when viyah came to, she asked to sing "oh no, You never let go / through the calm and through the storm / oh no, You never let go/every high and every low"...

 at such a young age, my girls know who to call on.

the paramedics, the nurses, the physician's assistant, and the pediatrician have all been amazed by viy. 
and, for what seems like the millionth time, i am amazed by a God who loves and sustains and cares.
i am amazed by His faithfulness in every situation.  and i am grateful for every incredible blessing He has given me.


reminded of my faith, whether calm or through a storm, every day is peaceful.


after the hospital... enjoying a muffin, together

indoor picnic... for now!

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Six.

You are six years old. And I will be forever thankful that I have known you outside of my womb for this long, that I have gotten the chance to watch the beginnings of your unique and dynamic journey, and that every single day our family has gained something special from you being in our lives. You are six years old. And I love so much of what that means. The parts that make me smile with the confidence of knowing you are still a small child. The parts of being six that make me take a deep breath and just soak in the moments of your innocence. You are six years old. And I hesitantly accept the parts that I do not completely love. The parts that make me look at your daddy with trepidation in the middle of one of your stories or questions. The facets of this age, of this growing up, that make me wince and tense up and struggle with letting you go. I know that you are only six. I see the way your face brightens when you point at a full moon or the proud smile when you re...
Post a Comment
Read more

The Most Beautiful Mama

My mama has always been beautiful. It is a beauty that is natural and effortless and is the type of beauty that filled my heart with longing when I was a child. I can recall staring at how flawless the even color of her skin was, how adorable the few freckles were on her cheeks, how symmetrical her nose was. I remember thinking how absolutely perfect she looked in a sari, her pleats folded so pristinely, and the tuck of material into her waist seamless and smooth.   I would often feel the softness of my mother’s hands. Hands that had delicate fingers that moved with precision and purpose. Hands that kneaded chapati dough and even held tight to a lawn mower. No matter what she did, her hands were always soft, always welcoming, always beautiful. But she never liked to focus on her own physical beauty. My mother’s true beauty comes from within.  I understood certain aspects of this inner beauty when I was a child. The beauty that comes from her servant’s heart and her wor...
Post a Comment
Read more

new list

here's to a new year: here's to the four seasons covered in snow, and rain, and sunshine, and falling leaves, and flurries once again, reminding us of God's craftsmanship and the necessity of change here's to the quiet moments of introspection and solitude, of restfulness and peace here's to the loud clashing of deadlines and due dates, of fears and failures here's to the trials and tribulations that test our character and force our discovery here's to a world that embraces thoughtfulness and charity and truth here's to a community of believers that will witness and help and believe and love here's to the lives that we are yet to meet and hold and to the ones we will part with as we whisper goodbyes here's to the future heroes that have not yet chosen their path and to those who have not yet grown weary of doing good here's to those who are sinking in desperation finding hope and acceptance and life ..... here's to our litt...
Post a Comment
Read more